What do you smell like when times are hard? Do you release pleasant aromas that keep people around you when pressure, trials, or hard times arise? Or are you so smelly that people run and hide from you every time you are experiencing some type of turmoil?
I was thinking about this and I thought about skunks. If you get to close they spray you, even if you don't know you are too close. Don't be that spouse.
Instead, focus on the fruit of the spirit. Read Galatians 5:22, 23. Ask God to work in you so that you can produce/develop those fruit for others to see.